Be true to yourself—and other dating tips from the founder of JSwipe

Be true to yourself photo
David Yarus, JSwipe Founder.

It's safe to say that David Yarus is a man of many talents. Speaking with him about his three businesses (JSwipe, Merkabah and mllnnl), meandering through tales of travels and dreams for the future, Yarus emanates the qualities of a profoundly driven person, adorned with a deep-seated spiritual calm and a well-spoken confidence that exudes warmth. 

Each of Yarus' professional endeavors strives for individual goals but is tied together by his signature spirit and quest for realizing something original and new. JSwipe is, of course, the app that brought Jewish online dating up to speed in the smartphone-savvy age; Merkabah is a clothing line inspired by the myriad sights, textures, and designs of the Tel Aviv shuk; Mllnnl is a digital agency of young creatives, aiding brands with a millennial focus to tell their stories. With all three organizations dovetailing, Yarus' burgeoning empire makes a statement appealing to the young, hip, spiritual Jewish person on a path to connecting with others who share a common sensibility.

Yarus is a born connector. When he began crafting JSwipe after Passover in 2014, bringing people together seemed like a natural fit. So, who better to ask about dating advice than someone who's been witness to so much burgeoning love? Yarus provided a few simple, yet heartfelt tips for approaching dating in the digital age.  

1. Be clear about what you're looking for

This might seem like a no-brainer, but the simple act of deciding what you want can lead to further happiness down the road. If you want to date around casually, that's fine! If you're looking for a serious relationship, that's fine, too! The most important part is taking the time to honestly decide what it is you want out of dating.

2. Clear a space

Make room for someone new to fit in your life. This means, don't text your exes. Don't continue flirting with that unattainable person who is keeping you from seriously dating in the first place. "If you're trying to call in big love," he says, "You have to make space. It's about presence, clarity, and emotional availability."

3. Be unabashedly yourself

"If not," says Yarus, "It's a recipe for disaster. From date one, just be you. Call out something that isn't true to yourself." At the end of the day, we just want to be ourselves in a relationship -- and wouldn't we want our partners to feel the same in turn? Showing your true self from the beginning can be scary, but it can also be a beautiful thing.

4. Be present and open-hearted

In big cities like New York and Chicago, everyone's dating everyone, and they show up wanting to protect themselves "with their heart closed," as Yarus says. He recounted a wonderful, refreshing date -- almost shockingly refreshing -- and what set it apart was that both people showed up fully present and fully open-hearted. "Everyone's been hurt, but magic doesn't happen in the comfort zone." 

5. Have fun!

As anyone who's logged onto a dating app knows, following this advice is easier said than done. Yarus suggests trying your best to get rid of any external pressures -- from family, from friends, from what you think dating "should be" or what your "perfect person" should or shouldn't have -- be yourself, enjoy the experience, and embrace the situation.    

Ashley Kolpak photo 375
Born and raised in Buffalo Grove, Ashley's been a little here, there and everywhere, but is a Chicago girl at heart. She currently works as a writer and editor for fitness, music, cultural blogs and more. She's a proud Illini (graduated with Bachelor's in Medi... Read More

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