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The un-first day of school

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The un-first day of school photo

It is strange to think about the things that you miss that you never envisioned you’d be the least bit nostalgic for. For me, this is the first day of school. Ever since I could remember, I mildly dreaded the first day of school. I loved shopping for color coordinated school supplies and picking out that outfit for the first day, that always seemed really cute and fashionable, but a few years later I would find myself asking “what was I thinking?” Even so, I never really looked forward to class, seeing certain people, and being at school in general.

There was always something that I would much rather be doing than staring at the clock, droning out my teacher or professors voice that explained the same set of instructions that I had been hearing for what seemed like eons, and writing down notes about the upcoming year or semester. Don’t get me wrong, I was always a good student and cared about doing well in class, it was just the actual being in class that seemed like a pain…and often it was.

However, today marks the first day since 1995 that I haven’t packed up a backpack or book bag, grabbed my favorite new pencils, and sat down at a specifically chosen desk ready for the first day of class and to be perfectly honest, it felt extremely weird. There is something about the structure of a classroom that is nice to have. These words would have never crossed my mind a year ago, but today, the end of class is real and kind of terrifying. In fact, I actually spent the day that should be my first day of class at an interview, which made this whole post graduate lifestyle switch all too evident to me. To be honest, I am not looking forward to trading welcome back barbeques and first day ice breakers, for job applications and daily edits to my LinkedIn profile. Although uncertainty and spontaneity can be fun, the quick trade from structure to close to chaos, is something that is extremely odd and scary for me.

So many of my friends who graduated last year, and even a few years before, still say they would do anything to be back in their college town for one more year. This is a constant topic of conversation and something that from time to time, I agree with. Looking ahead to a year of who knows what is weird, but I guess the only option is to embrace the uncertainty. So, here’s to a weird, random, and hopefully great year.

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