Rachel Bertsche, past contributing blogger
Rachel Bertsche is a journalist in Chicago and the author of the upcoming memoir, MWF Seeking BFF (Ballantine). Before leaving New York for the Midwest, Rachel was an editor at O, The Oprah Magazine. In addition to O, she’s written for publications including Marie Claire, Every Day with Rachael Ray, Teen Vogue, Outside, Fitness, More, Women's Health, Chicago Magazine, San Francisco Magazine, Ocean Drive and Field and Stream. Her interview with Katey Sagal, aka Peg Bundy, recently reached #1 on CNN.com's list of most-viewed stories of the day (her Q&A with Vince Vaughn also reached the top 10).
Rachel graduated from the Medill School of Journalism at Northwestern University, where she was the student newspaper’s resident sex columnist. When she’s not writing, Rachel’s out searching for a new best friend. MWF Seeking BFF will be out in January, 2012, but you can pre-order it here. You can follow her awkward and hilarious escapades on her blog, MWF Seeking BFF.
ARTICLES BY THIS AUTHOR
I always wonder what it would be like to be best friends with a celebrity. Like Julia Roberts. She’s always talking about her BFF Paige, who seems to be a regular Jane like you or me. Can you imagine if your best friend was Julia Roberts?!?!
When I first started writing about this search in online essays, between the rageful comments from the angry mob came a number of suggestions that I should try religious institutions to find my next best friend. Plenty of people said they made their closest friends in church group. A coworker tells me she met her besties at bible study.
Last night, while at my cooking club, I suggested that one of my fellow chefs try a delicious restaurant in my neighborhood. “I can’t go there,” she said. “I might see her.” The “her” in question is my friend’s ex-BFF.
This weekend marked another stop on the annual wedding circuit. I’m told that this phase of my life (we’re attending seven weddings in 2011, six of which are out of town) will slow down in a couple of years, but since I’ve already got four weddings lined up for 2012, I don’t see that happening soon.
Last Friday, through the cloud of my sinus-y, phlegmy sickness-from-hell, I mentioned that I recently had a bit of a making friends aha moment. Well, the clouds have parted, I can finally breathe through my noise and swallow without wincing, so I’m focused and ready to discuss.
If you met yourself, would you want to be your BFF? I think about this a lot. I heard somewhere that the usual answer is no--that we often don't like people who are too much like us. Which I can imagine might be true.
I was chatting with a couple during last weekend’s wedding happy hour, when the male half referenced a budding actor that he was “friends with.” Right on cue, his wife looked at him and said, “Are you friends? Or are you Facebook friends?”
When I was on my full-fledged BFF search, going on 52 dates in 52 weeks, people often asked me if I'd call off the hounds if I found The One. There were a few times when I considered it. I'd meet someone so fantastic and wonderful that I'd want to give up on everyone else and just dedicate all my time to that budding friendship.
It's been about two years since I launched my BFF search. As you know, I spent 2010 furiously dating. 2011 was about keeping up those new friendships, and turning "just friends" into "good friends." Now that more time has passed, and some friendships have faded and others have stood the (short) test of time, I have a better perspective with which to look back and see what this search has really taught me.
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