I am on the road, headed back to Washington from a long road trip to a wedding in Illinois. I put off submitting my post this month, thinking that the time in the car would leave me ample space and inspiration to craft a masterful piece for Oy! readers. Unfortunately, I'm stuck, and can't find the right topic to hit on this time. Per usual, I solicit my wife, Rose, for ideas.
"Why don't you write about how your wife always has to come up with your blog post topics?" she says, as she begins listing off some ideas.
Rose would like to see me write about the top 10 keys to a successful road trip or just focus on the debate we always have about where to stop for dinner. Do Oy! readers really care about our endless debate on whether one should do drive-through or sit down, fast food or a place where you get to leave a tip? It's a risky topic to cover, because Oy! readers might take her side.
She talks about how we have gone to some lovely weddings this month, most recently this past weekend. Could I write about wedding toasts? I hesitate because I can't figure out a way to do this without embarrassing our own families. Rose thinks that nobody remembers that story anyway.
For a moment, I consider an expose over the outrage that popped up lately in the Trader Joe's- loving, Kosher-keeping community around the U.S. Trader Joe's had to change its non-dairy label of chocolate chips to Kosher Dairy. It's a technicality based on how the equipment used to make the chips. Check your Jewish friends' Facebook pages- it's on there. You would think Trader Joe's was putting bacon in the chips the way people are talking.
Is the average Oy! reader trying to figure out how to make chocolate chip cookies for dessert after serving a brisket on Friday night? Do we even do surveys of our readers on Oy!? There's a topic to cover, the demographic breakdown of Oy!Chicago. The article would be titled a Dem-OY-Graphic Study of one of Chicago's Most Vibrant Online Communities.
Rose informs me that any time there is a debate, it piques a reader's interest. Could I write about our recent move to suburbs of D.C.? My post about Chicago vs. DC caused quite a stir. What about Evanston vs. Bethesda? Do people in Evanston know where Bethesda is?
Now Rose tells me to write about ice cream, or trees, or barns or gas…she's just listing off things she sees on the side of the road. No Rose, I can't write about those things; I'm out of space for this installment. If you have any suggestions, for what you would like to see this hopelessly blocked writer blog about next month, please leave them in the comment box or email my wife.